NHL Franchise Boys

[youtube]Vhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=tK8Qjo7HCIk[/youtube]

Alex Trebek is Canadian but why does he allow “Jeopardy” contestants to embarass themselves at the expense of the coolest sport on Earth? The “Jeopardy” producers know they’re dealing with a collection of eggheads, bookworms and Sheldon types from “The Big Bang Theory”. So most sports questions are begging for the obvious answer and hence any question about hockey stats will have an answer of “Wayne Gretzky”.

Yes, “Jeopardy”, we get it: No one knows shit about the NHL in the U.S. Even if you give them the answer in the question, they still can’t answer it.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=oSE5K2KNE4M[/youtube]

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=tHae-jr30X0[/youtube]

Banging on the glass during a fight or a scrum adds to the aesthetic, but the idiots that jump out of their corporately owned seats and put palms to panes whenever there’s a player within five feet of their viewing window … well, there really isn’t enough overpriced arena beer with which to soak them.

Idiots that bang on the glass make you want to applaud the morons who yell SHOOT during the power play. The fan that took a tumble on that collision was OK, and hopefully was able to appreciate the concept of karma. This has been a Public Service Announcement on behalf of everyone else in and around your section.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=9jYq0eHf3Ks[/youtube]

Last week, Warrior debuted an ad for their new Dynasty hockey stick, starring Zdeno Chara. In the ad, Chara, using the slick new hockey stick, blasts a snapshot at a goalie so hard that it causes an atomic explosion. That is the censored version of the commerical you will see on TV.

In the original version of the ad, which was banned by the NHL, Chara’s snapshot not only produces an explosion — IT SLICES THE GOALIE’S HEAD CLEAN OFF HIS BODY. Let this be a lesson to goalies everywhere: Zdeno Chara will end you, and then ruthlessly celebrate your demise. You have to love the schink sound the puck makes as it cuts clean through the goalie’s brain like a samurai sword. Clearly more evidence that Chara really is a headhunter (remember the hit on Pacioretty).

BTW… at the end of the ad, you see divisional rival Jimmy Howard saying “That mother****** is crazy.” Nice touch!